My Trip to the Big City

I’m mostly a homebody.  In fact, at this time I haven’t left my house in my vehicle since Monday.  It’s been nice. 🙂

But on this particular day, I had no choice.  I needed to get some paperwork from the ‘local’ courthouse.  I say local because it’s in another state.  Not exactly local in my mind.

My co-pilots were BP (of course) and Tim.  Now let me explain Tim a little.  He is my GPS.  A TomTom as a matter of fact.  I’ve had him for 8+ years and he has mostly served me well.  I say mostly because there was this one time he brought me to the edge of a cliff and told me: ‘you have reached your destination’.  No, no I haven’t, I told him.  *I always have wondered if he has had it in for me or not.

Now back to my trip to the big city.  This particular big city is right next to a bigger city that I have always said was a city of one-way dead end streets.  *Keep that in mind for later…

I had all my ducks in a row on this day.  BP was prepped and ready to go on our adventure.  I had a Mom-sitter lined up to feed Mom her lunch and put her to bed after.  The day was bright, no rain in the forecast. I had already looked at the map (I confess I used Google maps 😦 )  I was ready to conquer the world!

The trip went well for the first 40ish minutes.  Then I got to the outskirts of ‘the city’.  Now I expected traffic, but not THAT much.  We were still several miles from my exit (which was an earlier exit) and we were stopped.  Dead stopped.  As we inched forward I looked at Tim and he said I should go a few more exits.  But the exit sign I was coming up to was the one I thought I should get off at…

What to do, what to do – I actually chose right and got off the exit.  🙂

It curved around as I expected it to and landed me on the route I was supposed to be on.  According to Google maps I was 8 minutes away.  Not bad, not bad at all.  BUT I wasn’t quite sure where the courthouse was so I followed Tim’s directions.

I drove and drove and drove.  All the while BP is happy as a clam and chattering along.  Side note: I should have peed before I left and I was realizing this now. 😦

I drove along and passed a street sign that made me think I was about 2 blocks away.  Tim didn’t think so.  I drove and drove and drove.  I passed another sign that made me think I drove too far.  I even saw a business I recognized and seriously considered parking in their parking lot and walking to wherever I needed to be.  But it was cold and I had BP with me.  Best just to press on.

So I did.

I kept driving as the minutes ticked on.  I kept driving as I followed the detoured that threw Tim off completely.  I kept driving till Tim said I was back on track.

He brought me to a deserted(ish) area with no businesses – and certainly no courthouses, and told me: you have reached your destination.  No Tim, no I have not.

And now I really need to pee.

I tried to use my maps program on my phone – no go. *I safely pulled over to do this.

I drove and I drove and I drove.  I finally arrived at a grocery store that had free wifi.  But not from the parking lot.  I got BP out – left Tim in the car – I was upset with him, and went in the store.

I should make a little side note that I yelled at Tim and my phone and was policed by BP to not use those words.  I was told they were Dad words , not Mom words. 😉 Ah, ever listening. 🙂

First things first: I found the bathroom. 🙂

I then sat down and used their wifi to find where I needed to be.  I was only 3 miles away.  I needed to be: right back where I saw the street sign that had made me think I was almost there.  But at this point it was 40 minutes later.  *I hate the big city.

When I finally arrive I find a safe place to park, grab everything that I think I will need and off we go.  We walked as quickly as we could seeing as it was colder than we expected.  At the front door we find a sign that says to use the side door.  Ugh, no biggie.  At the side door I face what I expected: metal detectors.  I wondered how BP would do.

Not so good.  She started to cling to me saying: bad strangers, bad strangers, bad strangers.  The lady who was ‘checking’ us was not amused or helpful.  I finally made it through the detectors with BP and went on over to the records department.

After explaining what I needed and showing the clerk the proper paperwork: he told me I was in the wrong county courthouse.  Seriously?!?  Yep – I needed to go to the city with one-way dead end streets.  After it took me 2 hours to get here I had to go one more city over.

He must have seen the look of desperation in my eyes and said – give me a minute, I’ll check here.  Whew.  I’m glad he did!  He had both of the files that I needed.  Now to make copies.

I glanced around and noted the two copy machines (one not working).  They only took coins and small bills.  I had a $50.

I walked back over to the clerk, asked if they could make change.  He said: nope. Dope.  I explained I would be right back and please don’t put my files away.

We walked as quickly as would could back to our vehicle as I happily remembered I had library money in the car.  Quarters – woo hoo!

After we made it back to the courthouse, back through security, back to the records department, and retrieved our files.  I separated out which papers I need copies of.  21 of them.  I had $9.45 in pennies, nickles, dimes and quarters.  I could make 18 copies.  Which 4 to leave out, which 4 to leave out…  I found 3 no problem.  I looked up at a lady who was sorting papers too and asked: May I have a nickle.  She gave me a quarter! 🙂 Score! Copy 19 papers and go home.

HAhahahahah.  It’s never that easy.  And by the way: why are copies 50 cents a page?  50 cents A PAGE?

I went to work coping and let people with one or two copies to make cut on in.  Until I realized the copier didn’t take pennies.  Uh oh.  So I looked at the nice lady again and asked her if she had change.  She did.  After we traded I tried to get the copier to take a $10 bill.  It wouldn’t.  Neither would the change making machine.  What’s the point of a change making machine if it doesn’t work?

Now both the nice lady and I were getting desperate.  I had to make 1 more copy (really 4 would be better), and she need to make many copies.  She needed change worse than I did.  She went on a mission to find change to no avail.  After looking and hunting and searching and asking.  I got really desperate.  I had already tried to buy candy out of the vending machine in order to get change – I was that desperate.  BP was doing great all of this time, but I knew it was time to go soon and get her a nap.

I walked over to the nice clerk and asked him for help.  He said go on over there and they will make your copies for you.  Huge sigh of relief.  I went on over with my papers and money, asked the lady to make 4 copies.  She did. 🙂  I took them and ran.  Not really.

I put the file back together nicely and BP and I headed on home.

Lessons learned: never trust your GPS, if you think you are almost there – you probably are (the courthouse was just blocks away from the business I had thought to park at), and bring lots and lots and then some more quarters any time you go to a courthouse.

About hpwpbp

Wife Person to a wonderful Husband Person. Mother Person to a wonderful Baby Person.
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