I think I am losing faith in humanity… maybe I already have lost faith. See, here’s the thing, I have a few ‘close’ friends and a bunch of acquaintances. Not a bad thing, right? Here’s the problem – – > Some of them can not figure out how to make definite plans. As in commitment is non-existent. Here is an example of how it goes:
Friend 1: Hey, I’d like to get together with you on a regular basis.
Me: That would be great! How does every 3rd Thursday of the month sound?
Friend 1: That sounds good. See you then.
***Every month has ‘other plans’ on the 3rd Thursday…
Friend 2: Hey, text me this week if you have a free night
Me: Sure. (send text)
Friend 2: Oh hey, I already have plans
***While that is possible – it is unlikely that is true every time.
Friend 3: I’d love to get together with you soon
Me: That would be great. I’m free any time, except… When are you free?
Friend 3: Not for 3 or so weeks… I’ll get back to you
***Never hear from them
In the past, I would always send a text or call a few days before to make sure the plans were still on. I’d always get the same type of response: oh, not this time, or I’m not feeling good, or I have plans…. Now, I don’t even bother, I just assume the plans aren’t really going to happen. Call me cynical, but that’s where I am at right now.
Here is what I ask of you:
World – – > If you want to make plans with me, make plans. Not a some time in the vague future I will make plans to maybe hang out with you. Make then now, and stick to them. I understand that things change, and things come up, but not every-single-time-we-have-plans.
World – – > If you don’t want to hang out with me – don’t ask me if I want to hang out. It’s not going to hurt my feel goods. And I will have a heck of a lot more respect for you. Right now I just see you as someone who thinks they are popular, but aren’t. You are just a wise guy who can’t figure out how to be a true friend (by actually sticking to the plans you make).
World – – > If you do need to cancel plans with me – let me know. Don’t let me find out when I call to confirm. You already knew you would have to cancel, so you should have already called/texted me.
World – -> If you do want to hang out with me, please put some effort into planning when and where. Don’t always tell me to contact you. That just makes it look like you are ‘too good’ to actually make plans. Where in reality – you just don’t intend on hanging out with me.
See, I told you I was losing faith in humanity. Maybe not in humanity, but just in the ability of people to keep (or even make) plans. Why, oh why, do I even bother trying? Maybe I haven’t lost faith – – > I still try because I hope one day they will actually change and stick to their plans. In the mean time, I’m going to make plans with my friends who can actually keep their commitments!
P.S. I actually would like to hangout with the friends that keep ditching me – maybe we will be able to some day soon. 🙂